Do You Even Bikini Prep/I Suck At Blogging: 8 WEEKS OUT

….I have left you like a jar of peanut butter with half a tablespoon left in the bottom that is too little to scoop out with a spoon (anything less than 6 tablespoons is just pointless to consume!) I’m sorry, my lovely followers. I have been insanely busy at work (Excuse #1), attempting a social…

3 Month Countdown: UFE Showdown

So I have an app on my phone that counts down to my competition (as I mentioned in my last post) and today it alerted me that it’s… 3 MONTHS UNTIL UFE SHOWDOWN. Holy hell, right? Most people would start their “cut” at the 12-weeks-out mark but my sexy coaches gave me a 14-week bikini…

Do You Even Bikini Prep?

This is going to be a new thing, I know it. #DYEBP I haven’t written a post in forever. (I FEEL LIKE I KEEP WRITING THIS SENTENCE.) I’m sorry – I get super busy with work, training, Cellucor demos, my ghost writing on the My Virtual Mission blog, SLEEPING, and trying not to be too much of…

#GlutesForTheBrutes: A Playlist

You want a sneak peek into the little buds screaming sweet nothings into my ears? Yeeaaaaah, you do. Here is a retrospective view into my musical tastes over the past year: April 2013 was my My Lots of Cardio, No Carbs Playlist (Can I laugh at people who do this now, or…? Nah.) February 2013 was A…

Ambition & My First Real Off-Season: #2014MyYear

Hello? Is this thing on? I haven’t written on this baby in over two weeks! And I can’t remember the last fitness-related post I wrote. (I’ve been a crazy whirlwhind of things and updates, so I guess this will be a hefty post.) And lucky for you, I don’t really have any new material to rant…

One #Blessed Blonde: UFE North American Championships 2013

Okay so I may or may not be hopped up on my first Starbucks in a week – take a guess! – but I am feeling #highonlife! If you’ve been creeping following my Instagram/Facebook feeds this weekend, you’ll know that I competed in the Elite Bikini and Fitness Model categories at the UFE North American Championships…

My First Bash: UFE Halloween Mayhem 2013

What. A. Weekend. I honestly wanted to write a post yesterday but I was crazy overwhelmed with work and coming down from my competition high – I think they call it pure, unadulterated happiness? – so I finally have calmed down enough to post about the weekend’s shenanigans! UFE Halloween Mayhem was a freakin’ blast….

A Fitness Competitor’s To Do List: Extended Edition

  Soooo on Sunday evening, I posted a super brief “to do” list on my Facebook page giving a sneak peek into the tasks/errands/shit I have to do to prep in the final week before show day. In case you were curious (or, if you’re not, whatever – you’re creeping my blog, so you obviously care), I’ll be…

S.O.S.! Last Day of Carbs!

AIR HORN. AIR SIREN. WEOOOOOOOO. I have one more carb meal of the day until…. DUHN. DUHN. DUHN.  CARB DEPLETION. 8 glorious [sic] days of zero carbs and only eggs, tilapia and chicken breast. With my oils as “sauce”. #blessed This is my third time doing a carb deplete before a show and dare I…

Once Upon A UFE Workshop

So there were these two blonde girls. One was short and one was tall. They were like, “Yo, let’s go to this UFE Workshop, because I hear you can learn a ton of cool stuff there!” So these two girls went and these two girls DID learn a ton! I had heard good things about…

SIX WEEKS OUT: UFE Halloween Mayhem

I was bullied into writing a new post by Casey and Justin – SO HERE IT IS. I also figured I should keep with tradition and write a pre-competition post. Blah-zay-blah, I’m six weeks out from my next competition and let’s just say I am feeling fan-freaking-tastic. I have some pretty sick, two-weeks-out type of…

A Good Kind of Addiction

So I met with my coach last night at her new training studio, Sweatshop Union. It is gorgeous and awesome – I love it! The owner and founder, Brian, holds ass-kicking classes, including some glute-busting kickboxing classes that I have to check out. (And fitness babe, Justine Munro trains there too sometimes. She is the…